The Concepts of Sex and Gender

Ann Oakley defines ‘sex’ as visible biological differences between males and females. Gender however is a matter of psychological, cultural and social classifications of ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’. Let us consider the conception of sex as given by biologists, for them it has a dual meaning- firstly the differences between individuals and secondly the type of behavior that begins sexual reproduction. In purely genetic terms, a person with XY chromosome will be called a male and one with XX chromosome, female. Also the production of hormones lead to sexual distinction, we find a preponderance of female sex hormones like estrogen and progesterone in normal women and that of testosterone and androgens in normal men. On reaching puberty the effect of these respective hormones becomes more pronounced. Also in terms of somatype (body physique) there are certain sex differences which are visible and accepted as standard in our society. By examples of certain communities in Nigeria (malnutrition cases), American, Western and European groups we can show that there seems to be an interplay of biology with cultural contexts, of the sex-determining chromosomes on the secondary-sex characteristics.

There is another category of proven differences that is death, especially suicide which is linked either to mental illness or social situation. Elucidating on the aspect of gender, an everyday observation of society is sufficient to prove the gender-based differences. The stereotypical characteristics associated with males are aggression, fortitude and have the ability to control and manipulate the external environment. Women on the other hand are more sensitive and perceptive in their relationships, domesticated and emotionally liable. This reveals that biology alone cannot be accounted for the differences arising in the personalities of men and women. But Margaret Meed also describes certain societies that do not follow the traditional notions of masculinity and femininity. For instance the New Guinean Tribe of Arapesh has adult males showing gentle passivity, cherishing nature resembling the ‘females’ in our culture. Many anthropologists believe that there is a certain degree of coherence between the adult attitudes towards life and the techniques used in the upbringing of the particular individual. The ”social conditioning” of a child irrespective of his/her sex plays an important role in the formulation of his/her gender identity in his/her mind. A cross-cultural social survey conducted by Barry, Bacon and Child of 110 societies based on ethnographic literature, found considerable differences in the socialization of male and female children- boys were taught to be self-reliant whereas girls were trained to be subservient. More importantly, the differences of behavior between men and women inextricably link them to different ‘social roles’ and the division of labor in society. For instance the roles of the home-maker, the reader of children, the nurse are linked to women and the roles of the bread-earner, the rogue or the criminal are linked with men.

Connecting the argument to psychoanalysis, the verbal and aesthetic abilities of the two sexes also differ invariably as the intellectual and emotional quotient of males and females is not the same. The sex-gender debate has been continuing for centuries now and the aura of ‘naturalness’ that surrounds gender differentiation in modern society comes to us not as a biological necessity but simply from the beliefs people hold about it, that there are inborn differences between sexes, that differentiation increases social efficiency and that differentiation is a natural law. Because of this rationale of a society organized around sex based differences is never made clear and the idea of a society based on liberation from conventional gender roles is impossibility. Gender is a dynamic concept, it various across race, class, age, economic circumstances, culture and the like. Adjustment on the different implications. According to Robert Stoller is the ”amount of subjective maleness or femaleness of a person”. Susan Bason theorizes on the concepts of social roles and gender evaluations. The anatomical dichotomy and the societal transmissions of the yin (male) and yan (female) constitute gaps in the present day society. The sheer variability of the relations of men and women across social groups presents itself as an evidence against this crude biologically determinist view. The social constructions of gender, the idea that ‘anatomy is not destiny’ is also questioned and subverted by Simon de Beauvoir in her phenomenal work ‘the second sex’. The functionalist notions of sex roles were a precursor to the complementary relations between those from mars and those from Venus. The distinction is not treated as an ambiguous sociological concept. Judith butler argues using the linguistic notions of performativity; masculinity and femininity are established in a normative and regulative manner. These theoretical attempts help us draw a consensus between the two highly-charged critical parameters and make us realize that these regimes permeate into all aspects of society and cannot be analyzed in isolation. The stratification and classification of sex and gender inevitably intersects to form complex social configurations which cannot be exhaustibly discussed.

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Adult Dating – Better Sex Better Orgasms and More Romance

Here are some adult dating tips for better sex and better orgasms. Adult dating , or courtship as it was called in the old days, is a way of getting to know each other. Here is a sure way to score points on a date. Be nice, show some respect, and be fun to be with.

If you make it too obvious that all you want from your date is to get lucky you are putting too much pressure on yourself. This is going to blow your chances of getting anywhere . Your date already knows if you are going to get lucky or not.

So you want your date to be a success, yes? These adult dating tips will help.

Tip one. You do not have to have sex on the first date. However it could happen that you both “click” and sex naturally happens. It is not planned but is more spontaneous as a result of the attraction between both of you. Sex is fine then. But don’t force it. You might want to get to know each other better.

Tip two. If you are a guy it is nice if you pay for the first date. You do not have to pay for every date. But paying for the first date makes her feel kind of special.

Tip three. Don’t fall in love with your first date. Shop around and compare the qualities of the person.You do not have to marry the first date that comes along. Shop around like you do for shoes. You’ll know a good catch when you find one.

Tip four. Make your date fun. The fact is that dates can lead to seduction. Pay attention and put some effort into it. Make sure you smell nice. Make sure you look nice. And give your date a little bit of yourself. The real you inside of yourself.

Tip five. Be yourself. Don’t lie and try be something your not. This only wastes your energy and paints a false picture in the mind of your date. Be yourself and like it. This is an inner feeling that will attract the opposite sex.

Adult dating and adult sex is fun. It is a pleasure of life. Through dating you can find someone nice to share your time with. Commonsense with dating pays dividends and will make your relationship go a long way.

Why Adult Toys Are Not Bad Either

There have been leftovers of the free love generation who have managed to survive and the great thing is that in recent times there has been a sexual revival of sorts in America. A good example of this is that in the past 5 years or more, America has witnessed a baby boom, women once more want to be pregnant and have babies. This time though people are a tad wiser and mindful in their approach to sexual exploration. This has also meant that the once struggling sex toys industry is now able to breathe a sigh of relief. Even the most adamant people who refused to use such products as a means to derive extra sexual pleasure are not turning towards sex toys and no longer believe that adult toys are a social taboo. Yet there will always remain some people who will think that adult sex toys are not a good thing to use.

The reason for neglecting or brushing aside sex toys like a vibrator is mainly because of a misunderstanding about the uses and ramifications of such products. They would think that sex enhancement products simply undermine their self confidence of being able to satisfy their opposite sex in bed. While some others are of the view that adult toys are limited to extreme versions of fetishism. Well it would not be an understatement to say that both these conclusions are from the truth.

As we just mentioned earlier in the article that people from every walk of life are accepting the use of adult sex toys is not bad and therefore manufacturers are coming up with a wide range of products to suit the needs and wishes of consumers. Surely there are many products that experienced people can use but there are also quite a few products that cater to the needs of a novice user.

Major sex toy industry players are well aware of the fact that consumers want to keep their toys discrete. Therefore manufactures do design a number of products keeping this in mind. Today the vibrator is designed to look similar to a lipstick container plus lubes are described using terms such as ‘relaxation’ instead of using any explicit sexual terminology. Adult toys are not designed in a discrete manner so that when purchasing one the consumer feels as comfortable as when they are buying chocolates.

Now that your fears regarding buying and using sex toys has been addressed let us move to the question of the effect such products can have on an existing relationship. Till not a couple of decades ago the use of sex toys showed the person in poor light and it was suggested as an act of fetishism. In recent times though adult toys have entered the bedrooms of millions of couples looking to find that extra bit of pleasure in their sex life. Such toys are certainly a great way to explore hidden and never before tapped erotic relationship between two people. Surely sex toys will not lead to a division between couples, and are often a source that brings about new and exciting romantic situations.

Pornography As a Turn-On for Fun-Driven Adult Sex

Adventurous couples can buy a pornographic video and watch it together. That is generally a surefire way to end up in bed. In fact, it is usually when couples are in bed that they watch such films. And if the film is a good one they will enjoy being turned on as they watch it. Many couples find that the provocative content stimulates them to duplicate what is being viewed. They are impulsively driven to touch each other, kid around, mimic the sex acts, and swing from the imagined chandelier as they tickle each other’s fancy.

In many countries in the world, including most industrialized ones, pornography is not banned or hidden from view. For example, at King’s Cross district in Sydney, Australia a section of the city is designated to show and sell pornography Sex oriented videos, DVDs, books, sex toys, lubricants, assumed aphrodisiacs, are sold in kiosks and stores. Strip clubs, restaurants, massage parlors and other clubs are available to meet members of the opposite sex.

In Europe, in many countries, and cities pornography is not hidden and thus available for adults. In all the countries there are restrictions to the sale of pornography to children and prosecution of offenders is open and continuous.

In the US pornography is not banned from sale to adults although there is no tolerance on anyone abusing the Child Pornography laws.

But for the purpose of improving the sex life of adults pornography has a place for some. Do you have to be lonely or hard-up to use porn? The answer is No. Porn can be a substitute for sex for many lonely and sex starved adults, mainly men, and for adults without a partner who like visual stimulation for self-arousal.

Finally, let’s examine whether pornography can fit into the armamentarium of the average adult who wishes for increased stimulation for lovemaking. What can porno offer?
As with any movie there is added stimulation by watching real pictures compared to imaging such scenes. Some porno videos actually tell a reasonable story where there is more than just sexual exploitation. So some selection is necessary. Google is a good resource to discover what are considered the best sex videos made in the past few decades.

Beside adding visual stimulation couples can mimic what they see, learn about new positions, empathize with the excitement of the sex partners, imagine participating in the viewed sex, experience sex beyond their own interests, such as gay, bi, S and M, bondage, oral and anal sex, and the use of fetishes. Some show dancing, foreplay that could be stimulating and perhaps above all can act as a stimulus to open the viewers to become freer and lustier about sex.

If you attempt to try out the benefits of sex videos and it is new to you imagine becoming an adventurer and explorer so you don’t take a negative bias into your viewing. An open mind will allow you to gain what might be there for you. At the very worst it won’t have any effect on you and may even turn you off. If so, just chalk it up as another interesting experience.

To determine if pornography may be a stimulus for your personal sex life approach its use openly. It might be a new vehicle for greater enjoyment of sex for occasional use or even frequent use. Remember adults have no restrictions on what they mutually do and prefer behind closed doors. So enjoy the movies and enjoy the sex and know you have taken another step to gaining a new stimulus for sex and love.

by Marvin H. Berenson, M.D. July 12, 2011

To discover new and effective ways to have a wonderful, romantic love life and to become a great lover, my book “Love and Sex” offers frank and wide-reaching information. You will find a truly in-depth look at what actually happens during sex and how to overcome sexual difficulties. By reading this book you can change your love life.